It's Delle!

Someone on the WW boards mentioned they read my blog (news to me, I didn't think anybody stopped by here aside from my best friend!), so I thought I should put a little blurb about me. I made this journal so I can keep track of the things I'm doing and how I'm thinking and feeling as I journey along the road to getting thinner. It's not intended to be written to an audience, it is honestly something I am writing to myself, and I find it so helpful to be able to look back even 4 months ago and see what kinds of things I was experiencing...so many of our experiences in life slip through the cracks, and I want to remember as many of them as I can in relation to my weight loss; the good, the bad, and even the oh so ugly ones!

So many people say they've struggled with their weight for years, but this is not tue for me. I've been overweight from my earliest memories, and morbidly obese all of my adult life, but I was not the type to yo-yo diet, so in that sense I was not struggling. I don't know what my highest weight was because I didn't have a scale to weigh myself when I started getting set to lose weight. In the year before I started WW I started trying to eat less junk food and to get a little activity into my routine. When I started WW I was 288 lbs and wearing a size 22, and I know the year before I was wearing a size 26 (which was tight on me), so I'm guessing I was easily in the low 300 lb-range at my highest weight.

For the first year of my weight loss journey I was incredibly focussed and motivated. I was keeping my weight loss a secret from my family back home in Newfoundland, and my goal was to surprise them on my trip home in July. Needless to say it was quite a shock to a lot of people when I showed up over 100 lbs lighter without any warning!

Right now I am getting back on track after my trip back home. I wasn't following WW for a while due to comp issues, not to mention life issues, and I've gained back some of the weight I had lost. I got away from journalling, but I'm back at it again and am using it to help me get my focus back. I also like using it to keep track of my activity, although I've not had an organised execise regime for a few months now due to an injury. I'm getting back into my activity, however, and I will be updating all my numbers soon.

As I said, I don't write in this blog with an audience in mind, but if anyone had any questions or comments on anything here, please don't hesitate to post!

BTW, the name of my blog came from a comment my supervisor at work made one day when I was in the middle of a full-blown rant about something I had to do that was infuriating me. He interrupted me and said something to the tune of, "Don't worry about it you don't have to do it. And my goodness look at you! Where are you going, everytime I see you, you're smaller! It's crazy, you're the incredible shrinking woman!!" The moment was funny and unexpected and seemed to sum up my life right now, so I came home and re-titled my blog.

Now all I need is a cape...

Saturday, March 22, 2008

I hate people

Particularly men. WTF is up with males today, they're seriously pissing me off.

I don't know what's wrong with me, I'm so far from having a thick skin today, I feel like I have no skin at all. I'm unhappy and emotional and not myself today. I almost did something earlier today that would have been seriously vindictive, and I have no idea where it was coming from, all I know is that I wanted to do it so badly. When I look in the mirror all I can think is how fat I am. I'm having nightmares again. I don't understand why I'm feeling like this when my period ended days ago. I should not be having these inexplicable mood swings at this time of the month. If I didn't know better I'd think TOM was mere days away. I've noticed this on other months since WW, I'm starting to wonder whether my normal cycles are changing. I think I'll go stark raving mad if I have to deal with the hormones before AND after my period, it just isn't fair. If I'm going to start being hormonal after my period I should no longer have to be hormonal before, but I was insanely hormonal before this period so I don't see evidence of that. I was so short tempered when I got into work, not helped by having to go in early and not having time to make dinner to take with me, and I was all ready to be angry about finding out we're having a store meeting next weekend when I thought I was free and had made plans, and I come face to face with D and before I can even get started on a really good rant and head of steam, he just says, "But that's okay, because you won't be there, you have plans. And my goodness, look at you, I can't believe where this weight is going, everytime I see you now it's just insane it blows my mind, you're the incredible shrinking woman!" And that was enough to get me laughing and instantly snap my bad mood in half and end my rant before it could even get started. How I love that man. I'd just been feeling upset over something that pissed me off 10 min ago, and just remembering that made me smile and feel better. Okay I'm done for the night, I want this fucked up day to be over.

so says delle at 11:37 PM

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