It's Delle!

Someone on the WW boards mentioned they read my blog (news to me, I didn't think anybody stopped by here aside from my best friend!), so I thought I should put a little blurb about me. I made this journal so I can keep track of the things I'm doing and how I'm thinking and feeling as I journey along the road to getting thinner. It's not intended to be written to an audience, it is honestly something I am writing to myself, and I find it so helpful to be able to look back even 4 months ago and see what kinds of things I was many of our experiences in life slip through the cracks, and I want to remember as many of them as I can in relation to my weight loss; the good, the bad, and even the oh so ugly ones!

So many people say they've struggled with their weight for years, but this is not tue for me. I've been overweight from my earliest memories, and morbidly obese all of my adult life, but I was not the type to yo-yo diet, so in that sense I was not struggling. I don't know what my highest weight was because I didn't have a scale to weigh myself when I started getting set to lose weight. In the year before I started WW I started trying to eat less junk food and to get a little activity into my routine. When I started WW I was 288 lbs and wearing a size 22, and I know the year before I was wearing a size 26 (which was tight on me), so I'm guessing I was easily in the low 300 lb-range at my highest weight.

For the first year of my weight loss journey I was incredibly focussed and motivated. I was keeping my weight loss a secret from my family back home in Newfoundland, and my goal was to surprise them on my trip home in July. Needless to say it was quite a shock to a lot of people when I showed up over 100 lbs lighter without any warning!

Right now I am getting back on track after my trip back home. I wasn't following WW for a while due to comp issues, not to mention life issues, and I've gained back some of the weight I had lost. I got away from journalling, but I'm back at it again and am using it to help me get my focus back. I also like using it to keep track of my activity, although I've not had an organised execise regime for a few months now due to an injury. I'm getting back into my activity, however, and I will be updating all my numbers soon.

As I said, I don't write in this blog with an audience in mind, but if anyone had any questions or comments on anything here, please don't hesitate to post!

BTW, the name of my blog came from a comment my supervisor at work made one day when I was in the middle of a full-blown rant about something I had to do that was infuriating me. He interrupted me and said something to the tune of, "Don't worry about it you don't have to do it. And my goodness look at you! Where are you going, everytime I see you, you're smaller! It's crazy, you're the incredible shrinking woman!!" The moment was funny and unexpected and seemed to sum up my life right now, so I came home and re-titled my blog.

Now all I need is a cape...

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Anytime she goes away

I found out from F today that she applied for grad school in another part of the province, which I had been completely unaware of. She mentioned applying to the school as well as the one here in the city, but I wasn't aware that the school was so far away. I would be devestated if she were to move away, I just might have to go with her. We were discussing our plans for her to come home with me this summer to visit. She's been one of my biggest supporters on my weight loss journey, and I think she is just as excited as I am to see my family's reaction to my new body when I surprise them. The days keep slipping away, the next thing I know it will be summertime, and I will look like a new person. That being said, I might have to log a gain for this week, but I know I will get there in the end. I will have to officially WI tomorrow, because I forgot to officially WI before I ate breakfast, and I have such a big meal it won't be accurate. This is important to me because the scale is showing me up a few lbs from my last WI. I knew this would probably happen due to the fact that when I WI'd last week I was completely empty when I'd done so, and had not eaten for over a day. I'd also been sick and skipping meals. I knew when I logged the weight I did that it would probably set me up to show a 'gain' this week, and I debated it, since when I first WI'd I showed a higher weight than I eventually logged (I made a visit to the bathroom not long after I'd initially logged my weight, and it made a big difference to the number and after a lot of debate I went and changed the official number). I wasn't going to, but I decided after much reflection that I want to be honest with myself, and recording my actual weight is part of that, even if doing so means I will have to deal with logging a gain the next week. If I don't like how that feels, then it should deter me from the type of behaviours I was engaging in last not eating and skipping meals. I decided that having to face this will force me to acknowledge the concequences of what I was doing, instead of glossing it over and not really admiting to it. I will log a gain this week if that's what happened, and I will be happy knowing that I made healthy choices this week, and I ate my DPs and met the guidelines, more importantly. The best thing is that I wasn't eating lots of APs like I normally do, but I still avoided drawing on my FPs, overall, which means I've been relying on the veggies, and have been eating less points, which is a great victory this week. That is definitely something to be proud of, and much more noteworthy than having to log a gain tomorrow.

And I met THE most delightful man at work today, I wish I could have taken him home and kept him forever. He had the most incredible stories to tell me, and I could have listened to him for hours. It is beautiful to meet a man who has been married for over 40 years, and who is still madly in love with his wife, and talks at length about how stunning she is and how lucky he is to have her. I could have cried listening to him. Mrs. Alan Riding, I hope you know how lucky you are to have the love of this man, he renews my faith in men in general.

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