Friday night

It's very quiet here tonight. I was up at 4:30 this morning, and got home about 12 hours later. Work was okay today, it is always terribly busy on Friday, and I like having 3 1/2 hours before the store opens to work without distraction. D is so much fun to be around that sometimes it hardly seems like work. Then of course we have to start dealing with customers, and everything gets hectic. I can't imagine what things will be like when the Christmas rush starts! I tied to have good chats with the customers today, and while it was hard at times, at least my supervisor noticed I was making an effort to engage them and to work on the areas I'm not so strong in. There was cake for a coworker who is leaving us, but I managed to avoid the gathering by having to stay on the floor, and later ignored the cake when I was in the lunch room to get my things at shift end. I've been having to deal with the urge to eat things I want lately, more so than usual. I imagine it is the stress I've been under. I find myself thinking about how I would love to just eat what I want to eat, and to eat a lot of it. But I ignore the thoughts and think about something else. I've also been craving greasy food; when coworkers come in with McDonald's to eat, the smell of it almost drives me to distraction lately, but I ignore that too. It's amazing when I stop to think now just how long it has been since I have eaten greasy, fattening food in liberal amounts. It has actually been months, not just days or weeks. This is not a fad or a trend or a kick, this is how I am living. I am maintaining the same level of committment right now that I had on the first day I started. I had some days this week where I did not get all the requirements of the guidelines in, but I have still not eaten outside my points, and I have 28 of my Flex points left for the week. I have earned 43 APs so far. Most importantly, I have exercised a higher level of discipline the past two weeks during a time when following the plan is now as easy as it normally is for me, on account of being moody and not wanting to eat, or else having cravings to eat lots of food that would blow a whole day's points plus the week's FPs in one sitting, and more! The scale is showing me as up all week, and it looks like I will be showing a gain for my WI tomorrow, and I am disappointed, but it is to be expected. I need to buckle down and remember as I am possibly entering a new phase of my weight loss that I am in this for the long haul, and that no matter what the scale is doing, that I maintain my level of discipline. Losing weight is easy in the beginning, and I've tried to remember that surely as the sun will rise tomorrow, that it will get a lot harder, and that every pound will be a struggle. Keeping motivated when the pounds are falling off is not much of a trick; staying motivated when the going gets rough is the real test. I am determined to do this!

Earned 5 APs today: 60 min free weights