APs gone MIA

I've done okay today; I've met all the guidelines and I've not gone over my DPs, but I have none to spare and I might be going out this evening, so I might end up using the rest of my FPs since I never had a chance to earn any APs today, aside from doing some more housework. I'd planned yardwork and a bike ride, but like always seems to happen these days, my plan got changed around. I'm not planning to eat anything else tonight, but I might have a beer, and that will cost me FPs unless I come home and exercise. I don't have many left for the week after eating out on Tuesday and having a lot of high cal food that night. I am definitely not used to being this low on FPs at the end of the week, let alone on Thursday night! I'm glad I've started tracking again tho, because I am in obvious need of being specific about what I eat if I want to keep losing weight. I felt so much better last night when I was having some fruit, because I knew I had the points for it, and I knew exactly how much I could have. It was weird, when I was measuring it out, I didn't feel restricted, I felt empowered because I knew I was not overeating, I was completely within my points. It made me realise that when I'm not counting I have this little nagging worry about everything I eat, thinking that maybe it is putting me way over in points. It is easier to enjoy my food when I know I am not putting myself in a bad way by eating it.

I was starving tonight for supper, and the salad I'd made tasted soo excellent. A friend has reintroduced me to putting things in salad other than just the romaine, and I am now wondering how I ever got by eating all of those plain boring salads without cucumbers, mushrooms, tomatoes, and celery. Yes, you heard me...celery! Celery on its own is definitely not one of my favorite vegetables, but throw it in a salad and it tastes GOOD! Eating the salad tonight was a real treat, it was tastey, and I was so conscious while I was eating it that it was not just something I was able to it, it was something that tasted really good to me, and I was looking forward to every mouthful. What a gift that I've gotten to a point in my life that I can say that about a green salad, and that I am able to truly enjoy the things that I am eating. I heard people say that as they got further along into a healthy lifestyle that they came to like healthy foods that they hated previously. I was rather skeptical of ever being able to experience this myself, I mean seriously, you either like something or you don't, right? How could that change when it comes to food? But here I am living it, and definitely loving it! Food tastes definitely can change, thankfully, and hopefully I can get to a point where rich foods and/or junk foods don't taste good to me any more. A couple weeks ago in a weak moment I had a Wendy's burger for supper. We were running late, I was starving, and no time to shop for veggies etc, plus I just wanted one and made the choice to have one. No fries, no pop, nothing else with it, just the burger. It tasted wonderful to me and I enjoyed it soo much...until a few hours later when I woke up in the night to a VERY unhappy tummy, and puked the whole thing up. Does NOT taste as good coming up as it did going down, that's for sure. It's almost as if my body said "Uhh...are you kidding me? What's that thing doing in here? I don't think so. Nope. No Way. Get OUTTA HERE, evil Wendy's hamburger!"

Well, that's what I was imagining it was saying, anyway. I had felt awful beforhand but after the burger was evicted from the premises my stomach felt okay again and I actually had a giggle over imagining that it was a result of my body's indignation at having been forced upon by greasy fast food.

No, I didn't enjoy getting sick, but in a way I was almost pleased by it, if it really means that my body has embraced healthy eating. If I had to choose I'd rather have a body that ejects fast food than one that drives me to eat more more more of it. But then again, maybe I just had a bad burger, who the heck knows? I don't and I don't care, it's not like I'm going to be putting these theories to the test any time soon. I don't plan to go back to eating greasy fast foods, if I need to eat out fast, there's almost always a subway closeby, and it's getting so that most places have sandwiches and salads/soups to choose from. But maybe I actually am getting to a point where junk food is going to have less of a positive effect on me than before at least, even if it stil tastes good going down. Maybe in time it won't taste good either, at this point I'm ruling nothing out, I've experienced WAY too many firsts on this journey to assume anything!